The Hidden Link Between Alcohol and Burnout (and how to relax without drinking)

Episode 241: The Hidden Link Between Alcohol and Burnout (and how to relax without drinking)

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“Alcohol doesn’t take stress away, it delays it and then it times 1,000.”

Do you ever reach for a drink at the end of a stressful day, telling yourself it’s the only way to relax? I used to live in that cycle. After bartending shifts or long days at the clinic, I believed alcohol was the answer. But what I discovered is this: alcohol doesn’t relieve stress, it fuels burnout. It may sedate for a moment, but afterwards leaves me more anxious, more tired, more depleted.

In Episode 241 of Sober Vibes, I dig into why alcohol and stress are so connected, why that temporary relief always comes at a cost, and what tools really work to help you unwind without needing a drink.

Why Alcohol and Stress Are So Connected

It feels intuitive, right? You have a rough day at work, the kids have been screaming, the bills are stacking, and that glass of wine at dinner seems like the cure. But what it really does is mask stress for a little while. It sedates, numbs, but you wake up still dealing with everything PLUS the effects of alcohol on your body.

• Alcohol causes a spike in cortisol (the stress hormone) while your body is processing it. Source
  
• Sleep gets disrupted. Your REM and deep sleep cycles suffer, so you wake up foggy, less resilient, more reactive. That only adds to stress. Source
  
• Anxiety and restlessness often rebound after alcohol’s sedating effects fade. What looked like relief becomes this cycle: stress, drink, crash, stress again.

So while that drink may feel like relief, biology shows it’s essentially borrowing calm now and paying with more stress later.

The Burnout Cycle Explained

This cycle is way more common than people realize: stress, drink, poor sleep or regret, more stress, repeat.

Once you’ve been using alcohol to handle stress, your system starts expecting it. The moment you feel overwhelmed, you reach for a drink. But it doesn’t solve anything long term. It delays feeling, and then the next day or later in the week, that delayed feeling is more intense. More guilt, more shame, more tension.

That’s what I call the burnout cycle. It’s when alcohol becomes not just the coping strategy, but the center of how you try to manage emotional overload. And it leaves you burned out in every sense—mentally, physically, emotionally.

• Alcohol’s sedating effect lowers defenses temporarily, but cortisol spikes while your body processes the alcohol, causing elevated stress even when you're not drinking. Source
  
• Because of disrupted sleep or restless nights (hangxiety, guilt, etc.), the next day is often worse. It’s harder to focus, easier to be triggered, easier to feel overwhelmed.
  
• The feeling of “never quite catching up” with rest and peace becomes part of daily life, making the idea of relaxing without alcohol feel impossible for many.
  
  

Stress Is a Signal, Not the Enemy

Here’s one of the biggest mindset shifts I want you to hold onto: stress is not your enemy. Stress is your body telling you something needs attention. Maybe you need rest. Maybe connection. Maybe you need to address something you’ve been avoiding.

When you numb stress with alcohol, you’re suppressing that signal instead of leaning into it. It gets stored, it becomes stagnant, and eventually it starts leaking out in anxiety, burnout, sleep problems.

Sitting with your feelings isn’t easy, but it’s where real healing starts. Whether you journal, therapy walk, talk with a trusted friend, do something that helps you feel instead of drowning it out…it matters more than you think.

What To Do Instead of Drinking

Here are tools & rituals I use / teach that work, especially when stress feels overwhelming:

Micro-rituals to Retrain Your Nervous System

• Deep breathing exercises or a few minutes of mindful breathing.
  
• Sipping tea or a mocktail without distractions *cough doomscrooling*.
  
• Walking outside. Let your body move, let your breath settle.
  
• Music you love: sing loud, drive with the windows down, whatever makes you feel alive
  
  

Sleep Hygiene & Quality

• Avoid alcohol close to bedtime—it may help you fall asleep faster but degrades sleep quality, especially REM sleep, leading to hangover anxiety or insomnia. Source
  
• Stick to consistent bedtime routines, dark/quiet rooms, limit screens before bed.

Redefining what relaxation means

• For me, relaxation now looks like a warm shower + reading in bed, a therapy walk, laughing with my son, taking naps when needed.
  

• You might need to experiment: mocktails, cozy blankets, journaling, cuddling with a pet. Find what restores you.
  
  

Getting support and holding space for accountability

• Don’t do it alone. Coaching, community, therapy—they all help you stay on track when stress tries to pull you back.
  

• Support helps when willpower is tired. It gives you extra energy when you feel depleted.

Build Consistency & Give It Time (30–90+ Days)

• These rituals take time to embed. Alcohol often has years of habit behind it; our new habits need patience and repetition.
  
  

Redefining Relaxation

When drinking is your go-to for relaxation, you have to create new meaning for “relax.”

• I had to shift from “cocktails at sunset” to things like warm showers, reading before bed, therapy walks, being present with my son.
  
• Replace old associations: mocktails instead of wine, cozy blankets instead of couch with booze, journaling instead of doom-scrolling.
  
• Relaxation doesn’t have to be grand. Sometimes, it’s small, soft, restorative.
  
  

Support and Accountability

This isn’t something I believe we should face alone.

• Isolation often fuels the stress → alcohol cycle. Having people who understand gives you strength on the hard days.
  
• Coaching, therapy, sober community groups—they provide structure, encouragement, reflection.
  
• Studies on stress reduction show greater results when people engage in supportive interventions. Whether formal therapy or informal check-ins, it helps keep relapse triggers in check.
  
  

Conclusion

If stress has been your trigger for drinking, know that you are not alone. Alcohol might feel like it relieves stress in the moment, but it never fixes the root cause. It delays, it numbs, it burns you out in return.

You have the power to shift the story. You can listen to stress instead of numbing it. You can build micro-rituals, redefine relaxation, and get the support that helps you stay strong. It won’t always be easy—but it will be worth it.

Let’s break out of the stress-drink-burnout cycle together.
And remember: you’re stronger than the pull of the drink.

As always,

Keep on trucking.

Thank you for listening!

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