Alcohol & Anxiety | Why That “Relaxing” Drink Makes You Feel Worse (and What to Sip Instead)

Episode 245: From Alcohol-Induced Anxiety to Calm | What to Drink Instead of Alcohol for Anxiety Relief

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"Alcohol doesn’t calm you,
it confuses your body into thinking you’re relaxed
while turning up the stress inside you"

Here’s a glance at this episode:

Feeling anxious after a drink or even the next morning? You’re not imagining it. Alcohol might feel calming in the moment, but it actually triggers your body’s stress response and keeps you stuck in an anxiety loop.

In episode 245 of the Sober Vibes Podcast, I break down the science behind alcohol-induced anxiety and share practical ways to soothe your nervous system without reaching for a drink. You’ll learn how to replace the alcohol ritual with nourishing, calming alternatives that truly bring relief.

What You Will Learn In This Episode:

•  Why alcohol spikes cortisol and worsens anxiety
•  How drinking to relax creates a cycle of stress and poor sleep
•  Calming, healthy drinks that actually help—herbal teas, adaptogenic tonics, CBD seltzers, and electrolyte mocktails
•  Simple daily habits to shift from anxious to grounded
•  How support inside the Sobriety Circle helps you build real calm and confidence

Skip the reading & watch the YouTube video instead: 

The Anxiety Loop Nobody Talks About

Ever reach for a drink to relax, only to wake up feeling more anxious? You’re not imagining it.

I spent years in that exact loop. I’d pour a glass of wine after work, telling myself I deserved it after a long day. I’d feel calm for an hour, maybe two, and then wake up at 3 a.m. with my chest pounding and my thoughts racing. The next day, I’d feel irritable, foggy, and on edge. That “relaxing” drink had somehow made my anxiety worse.

Here’s the truth most of us never hear:

alcohol doesn’t calm anxiety. It creates it.

Let’s break down why that happens, how it traps you in a cycle that’s hard to escape, and what you can do instead to actually find calm that lasts.

The Science Behind Alcohol-Induced Anxiety

Alcohol tricks your brain into thinking it’s relaxing. When you drink, your brain releases dopamine, the feel-good chemical that creates that quick sense of relief. You might feel your shoulders drop and your mind slow down. But underneath that short-term calm, your nervous system is quietly going into chaos.

Here’s what’s really happening:

• Alcohol suppresses GABA, the neurotransmitter responsible for calmness.
  
• It spikes cortisol, your body’s main stress hormone.
  
• When the alcohol wears off, your body tries to overcorrect itself.
  

That overcorrection is what causes the heart pounding, sweaty palms, and racing thoughts that show up hours later. It’s your nervous system fighting to rebalance.

People often call this “hangxiety.” It’s that uneasy, anxious, shaky feeling that hits after drinking—even if you only had a couple of drinks. You might wake up in the middle of the night feeling panicked, or notice your heart racing the next morning for no reason.

You’re not weak or crazy. You’re in a chemical tug-of-war your body didn’t ask for.

The Cycle That Keeps You Stuck

Once you understand the science, it’s easy to see how the anxiety-drinking loop forms. You drink to calm down, you wake up more anxious, and then you drink again to take the edge off that anxiety.

For years, that was my normal. I didn’t realize I was creating my own stress cycle. After I turned 25, my hangovers started morphing into full-blown anxiety attacks. Sometimes they escalated into panic attacks that left me terrified to be alone.

I remember sitting there, hands shaking, telling myself I just needed to “relax”, and believing alcohol was the only way to make that happen. But all it did was make things worse.

The cruel part is that the more anxious you feel, the more you crave the thing that’s causing the anxiety. That’s how people end up stuck. You’re trying to soothe your nervous system with the same thing that’s setting it on fire.

And once you start to fear the anxiety or panic that follows drinking, it becomes even harder to quit. I know that fear. I know how tempting it is to reach for a drink to avoid that next attack. But I also know this: you can’t heal anxiety by fueling it.

Breaking the Loop

There’s no easy way around this...you have to walk through the discomfort to get free of it.

If you’ve been drinking regularly, talk to your doctor before quitting. Detoxing can be dangerous without support, and I always recommend getting professional guidance. Once you have that in place, the next step is simply to stop putting alcohol in your system.

The first few weeks can feel rough. You might feel more anxious before you start feeling better, but it’s temporary. Your body is learning how to function again without artificial sedation.

One of my clients said something that stopped me in my tracks:

“Not drinking alcohol is my anti-anxiety medicine.”

That’s it. She nailed it.

When you stop drinking, your body begins to naturally regulate your stress hormones again. Your sleep deepens. Your mood stabilizes. Your heart rate evens out. Over time, you realize how much of your anxiety was chemical, not character.

You don’t have to keep running from your feelings. You just have to let your body do what it’s been trying to do all along, find balance.

What to Drink Instead

Let’s be real: quitting drinking doesn’t mean quitting rituals.

We’re human. We love the ritual of a drink in our hand, something cold or cozy to mark the end of the day. The goal isn’t to give that up, but to replace it with something that actually helps your nervous system instead of hijacking it.

Here are some of my favorite swaps:

Adaptogen Elixirs

Drinks that include ashwagandha, reishi, or magnesium can naturally support your body’s stress response. Adaptogens help regulate cortisol, which means you’ll start to feel calmer without the crash.

Herbal Teas

Chamomile, lemon balm, peppermint, and lavender tea are my go-to’s. They’re soothing for both your digestive and nervous systems. I love making a ritual of it. Think: pretty mug, soft blanket, no phone in sight.

CBD or THC Mocktails

Not everyone is into this, but I’m a fan of harm reduction. For some people, CBD-based beverages can ease tension without sedation. I’ve even seen clients use light THC-CBD blends to taper off alcohol in early sobriety. The key is awareness, not perfection.

Electrolyte Mocktails

Hydration plays a huge role in anxiety. Dehydration can mimic anxiety symptoms like dizziness and heart palpitations. I love mixing sparkling water with coconut water and citrus for a refreshing, anxiety-friendly mocktail.

Magnesium Mocktails

If you struggle with restless sleep or that 3 a.m. wake-up, magnesium is your friend. Mix Calm magnesium powder with cranberry juice for a bedtime mocktail that promotes deep rest and reduces cortisol spikes.

Cozy Rituals

Sometimes it’s not about the drink at all, it’s about the moment. Hot water with lemon, decaf coffee, or tea in your favorite wine glass can give you the same sense of comfort without the crash. During my bartending days, I used to sip hot water just because it felt grounding. It’s simple, but it works.

These swaps aren’t about pretending to drink. They’re about teaching your body that calm doesn’t have to come from chaos.

Regulating Your Nervous System Beyond the Glass

Quitting alcohol is only one piece of the puzzle. If you’ve been drinking to manage stress, you’ll need to relearn how to regulate your nervous system in healthier ways.

Here’s what helps me (and what I teach inside The Sobriety Circle):

• Breathwork. Slow, intentional breathing signals to your brain that you’re safe. Try inhaling for four counts, holding for four, and exhaling for six.
  
  
• Journaling. Write down your thoughts, fears, and wins. Getting them out of your head is powerful.
  
  
• Movement. Gentle stretching, walks, or yoga help release tension stored in your body.
  
  
• Grounding. Go outside. Stand barefoot on grass, take a walk, or touch something solid when you feel anxious.
  
  
• Rest. Sleep isn’t a luxury, it’s medicine for your nervous system.
  
  

You don’t need to numb your stress. You need to support your nervous system. That’s where real healing starts.

When you pair emotional work with physical support—food, hydration, movement—you start to notice something beautiful: peace becomes your new normal.

Real Calm Doesn’t Come from a Bottle

For years, I believed alcohol was the only thing that could help me relax. But every drink was a lie.

Alcohol doesn’t soothe you—it confuses your body into thinking you’re calm while quietly ramping up your stress. It makes you feel like you’re in control while it slowly takes that control away.

When you finally step off that ride, your nervous system gets to reset. You start to experience what calm actually feels like. Your mornings are lighter, your thoughts clearer, your energy more stable.

You don’t have to chase relaxation anymore. You can live in it.

So next time anxiety hits, reach for something that supports you instead of something that steals from you.

You’re not missing out on anything by skipping the drink. You’re gaining everything: clarity, peace, and the confidence that comes from knowing you can handle life as it is.

If you’re ready to break free from the alcohol-anxiety loop and build real calm that lasts, come join me inside The Sobriety Circle. It’s where I teach women how to regulate their emotions, find their rituals, and create a peaceful relationship with themselves, no wine glass required.

You deserve to feel calm in your own skin again. And I promise, it’s waiting for you on the other side of that pour.

Thank you for listening!

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